Tesla accepts Solana

BluShark Media
3 min readApr 1, 2022

Elon Musk loves the faster blockchain more than Doge

Edward N. Apr.1, 2022

Farewell Doge

Elon Musk has recently gone on to state his love for the Solana blockchain. The recent Trillionaire has suggested that he wasn’t very sure why he was so into Doge in the first place. On Mar.31 he tweeted “#Solana is the wave, don’t know why I was so into #Doge” This prompted the price of Solana to once again go up from it’s dismal beginning of the year price to a current price of over $130.

Elon’s new love interest

The trillionaire then went on to speak to Solanews about his plans for world conquest and how Solana would help him complete his 2 year plan to have every man, woman, and child uploaded to one of his Optimus Teslabots. In a statement to Solanews he replied “ You know Doge was just a gimmick-a way for me to get people’s attention, I then set my attention to other blockchains I could use to manipulate markets and get more money; wow Solana is it! With all of the rugpulls and the recent low price of the token I knew I could make a killing if I just sent out one tweet!” The amazing Mr. Musk has been known to be some sort of eccentric evil mastermind that uses crypto to make gains while other people lose their life’s savings and he was able to woo us as well.

In speaking more with Elon Musk, we asked if he plans to allow users to use Solana to pay for his vastly overpriced Iphones on wheels. “Oh absolutely , give me that dough bro!” he emphatically replied. The trillionaire genius also said that if you bought your Tesla with Solana you would get what he calls a “Sol Brother Discount” plus fuzzy disco ball dice for the rearview mirror. Dyno-mite!

Sol’d Out

Right now is the perfect time to get a Tesla as Mr. Musk has announced a sale on his cars for the next 24 hours and if you are a business owner you will be able to collaborate with him on his new Solana-based Metaverse that is primed to take over the world and provide him with more money to have more babies with his overtly artistic wife. That’s right you can help him have more kids with strange names as long as you purchase with Solana and are a business owner, he likes to call this his “magnet carta” business suite. By now if you haven’t figured out this is an April Fool’s joke we sincerely wonder about your mental health.

Happy April 1st from all of us at Solanews!

This article was written in jest and not meant in any way to be taken literally or seriously. We at Solanews do not wish to insult or make fun of anyone intentionally. The likelihood of any of this being or not being real has nothing to do with us.

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